H4U, I think to an extent, you are kind of like my H. I think he is to the point of feeling like I am not doing anything for him. It's a little different though. And he didn't feel that way until he found out about the As. He has rewritten our history. He has no objectivity anymore.
Did you read that part of DB, or was it somewhere else, where those people had a chart? Maybe you could keep on in a diary for yourself. You make a checkmark or write down the time every time she does say thank you or she does do something appreciative towards you. Then you get a realistic view of the things she really has or really hasn't done. Even in the course of a day, people forget. If she could see it, too, it might help either remind her to say thank you/please or it might show her how much you are appreciative compared to her. There could be bennies but there could be negatives, too. Not sure. If you do it, I would be interested to know the fallout.
I hear you being tired of the crumbs. I have been willing to take whatever crumbs and I'm tired, honestly. I never believed he loved me enough...the whole time we were married. And him refusing to even work on the marriage just shows I was right. He didn't love me enough. We'll see. I read somewhere...about it being funny how we love our kids no matter what they do to us...we tell them or show them how they are wrong, but even if they make the mistake we love them anyway...why don't we treat our spouses like that?
It is added to my list of things to do differently next time if there is a next time. Honestly, I am paranoid to even think about a next time. I am paranoid to ever have to go through this again, from the other side. Being left. Abandoned. It makes me want to puke.
Hey...you said you were tired of crumbs, so you got puke!!
No complaining!! At least it's something DIFFERENT. lol...
Take care.
Melissa
"Standing knee deep in a river and dying of thirst."
Hey...you said you were tired of crumbs, so you got puke!!
