a new 2moro I am taking paxil 20mg, sad aint it, I still am not doing so well at times. BUT GOD is getting me thru it. I have hard times, I get angry and show it, but I am learning.
UPDATE ON SON: My son just walked in the door about an hour and a half ago. His dad dropped him off. (remember what I wrote earlier about him moving in with his dad and other woman). Anyway I was surprised to see him, but told him I was glad he was home. He hugged me and told me he was sorry. He started talking and I just listened, asking very few questions. He said Mom that was just too weird for me and dad said he understood. He said, "Mom that girl is sooo young and very skinny (they say she is a pack of bones), he said, when I got in the truck with them she sat in the middle, right on top of dad and put her arm around him.", He said it was sick. My son also said, "She sits in the same chair with dad and hugs on him ALL the time. Dad doesnt really hug on her. I asked him if his dad seemed Happy, and he said not really, but he didnt know....and I am sure he didnt want to hurt me. He said the girl didnt talk and was really quiet. OPPOSITE of me. I talk constantly....so I guess he was looking for something different. My son said she had her stuff ALL over the bathroom. He also said, she had bought my xh a 130.00 pair of shoes and had bought Nascar tickets to a race in March. Instead of my xh spending money on her, she is spending big bucks on him sounds like huh? My son said it felt so weird and that NO ONE would EVER replace his MOM. (smiling).
I guess he needed to see that, maybe now he will understand my point of view. He also told me that xh said he was SURPRISED that I hadnt called him..????? I dont understand this because he got a protection order against me and I wasnt allowed to call. I guess he figured I would break it. He told my son I needed to keep up the good work of not contacting him. Sounds desperate to keep me away doesnt it to you? XH is gonna get a surprise, because after we go to court and IF the order is lifted I still am NOT going to contact him! This little bit of time has made me realize I CAN live without talking to him after all. And while in court I am keeping my mouth SHUT!!!! He is gonna see that I am getting over him little by little. I still love him, but he dont have to know that. ALSO, I will be looking GOOD! The ow is a pack of bones, size -0, and she has been talking about me being a size 14-16. She says my xh has moved on to "smaller and better". I dont blame her for him leaving me BUT I do not appreciate the stuff she throws in my face and the talk she does about me. I AM a better person and wiser because I AM older!
