Que Sera, Sera - Whatever Will Be, Will Be

[lemonsnap]

I am feeling a bit better. I went out with my friend last night for a walk and dinner and she wondered how I could be so calm. She wondered if I'm in shock.

Who knows - I may be! I told her that it was definitely a roller coaster, and that I know I won't feel this way all the time. But I also acknowledged that I can't feel so excruciatingly upset/sad/destroyed all the time either. It's just physically impossible. Too exhausting. So I'm just trying to take things as they come, one day, one hour, one minute at a time.

I've got the DB book at home (from the library) but I haven't specifically shown it to him. I'm the reader in the family, and he rarely if ever picks up a book that I have at home. Either way, I'll take note and keep it out of the public eye. I've been deleting the history on our home computer and have been doing most of my posting from my office computer.

I would like to continue going to a C even if H doesn't want to. Not sure if I could keep seeing the MC if H isn't interested, but she can probabaly recommend a good IC.

Friday: Tonight we're going to MC, and I have a video at home, so we can always watch that after MC. We went out for ice cream after the first session, which was nice. Maybe we'll do that again.

Saturday: It's a friend's birthday tomorrow, so I'm going to help her celebrate, with or without H coming along. She wants to go roller skating :), out to dinner and dancing, which all sound like a lot of fun - I'm in!

Sunday: My mom and I have tea planned with a friend and her mom. This is a bit hard since I'm just going to pretend that nothing is wrong (HAH!). I'm not to the point of discussing our impending separation with others yet. It just doesn't feel right.

It IS nice up here - cold, but sunny, which I'll take over the rain anytime. I'll probably go out for a nice walk in the sun too.

Thanks for the heads up about the DA club. I'm coming over to visit. Sounds helpful.