Hi Nerfus,
I don't get ot the boards that much anymore but occasionsally stop in and do some lurking. I'm sorry about your need to be here, but as you are probably already figuring out its a good place.

I was reading your sitch and felt that I had to add on thing. I can understand your hesitation to call the police on your wife when she hits you. I experienced something similar but on a much different scale. In my case it was a girlfriend not a wife, I was young (18-19 yrs or so) and I am a big guy, so there was no way that I was going to call anyone for help. I found all kinds of reasons to explain her behavior away. In the end I left her and moved on with my life.

BUT, your case is much more serious, you are married and you have a child. The thing that I didn't see anyone mention that concerns me and should be your driving force is your daughter.
You say that W already looses her temper with D9 but not as bad. When might it escalate, how long before she does something to her? And, what is she learning from this.

The other thing is that when you picked up the phone and it froze her, and you stopped. That is probably ok, call it a warning, but if it happens again you absolutely have to make the call, because if you don't she will see it as a called bluff and it will give her more control of the situation. Plus each time you let it slide, will make it more difficult for you to make the call.

I sincerely hope that things get better for you, and the first step to that is for you to take care of yourself.

Steel_Box