she texted me and asked me if she could come by my place and asked me if I would help her paint her toe nails tonight - she has never asked me to do this before - ever.
Oh this just keeps getting better by the minute!! It is better than watching a movie....LOL. Well, I am glad that you googled this information b/c I have been M many years and it has never one time crossed my mind to ask my H to paint my toenails! I'm sure he would probable have me committed......somewhere.
You mentioned that I was a fan......oh you better believe it! I wish you could bottle what you have found and sell it to all the LBH's......and LBW's---as far as that goes. It works for both sexes. You have to be sold on yourself before you can sell yourself to somebody else and that is exactly why it is not fake for you. That is what you have accomplished. It is great. I just don't want you to mess up by being overcome by fumes of nail polish....LOL. It does seem frivilous and I would find an excuse or just laugh and say that you will have to decline (or even that you plan to recline....lol). She is so curious about what you are up to that she is about to pop! I loved that part about your cell phone ringing and you handled that so perfectly! I got such a kick out of reading that. She really has her nerve asking who it was on the phone, doesn't she? Oh, but you are learning so fast just how to answer and as I have said to others, if you aren't sure what to say, just smile. Just b/c she asks, you don't have to answer. I think she will start coming by unexpectantly to see if you have female company there. She does seem to be getting desparate for excuses....LOL.
BTW, I also loved how you handled the situation with the kids. Good for you! And the part about how you were keeping up with the kids laundry on your end of it......was priceless. I just wouldn't make it a practice to be doing "all" the laundry just b/c she doesn't do what she is suppose to be doing. Like I've said, you have to almost treat her like a child b/c that is exactly how she is behaving. What you said about her parents told me a lot about why she throws those fits. I would be willing to bet that is how she got what she wanted from them all her life. But to see a grown woman do it is terrible! I'm sorry to say it, but I have seen more than a few that resort to that behavior b/c that is what they always did. You said it....it is very unactractive, not to mention how unladylike it is.
I would not worry at this point of not showing or returning as much attention (and especially any affection) to her as she is giving to you. That is the point. She needs to "work" for you. You are becoming more and more attractive to her. So, don't quit now. Plus, after the cell ringing in perfect time, she wonders if another female out there is after you, so that will make you even more attractive. It is just old human nature......that is how it works.
You are being unavailable to her, and you are being vague about your plans; you are forcing her hand about keeping the kids when she should--and give you time to GAL; you are holding her feet to the fire about the fits; and yet you manage to do this without coming across as an a$$. I love the way it has just rocked her world.....hahahaha. I can see why it would shake her up, but I can almost promise you without a doubt that if you keep doing what is working.......she will be yours (if you decide you still want her). You have changed so much that you may even change your feelings toward her and decide you deserve better. If that happens, and for the sake of the M and the kids--I hope it doesn't and the two of you can get back together, but if it should happen then don't beat yourself to death b/c you certainly have worked hard and I know you are going to continue working as long as there is love in your heart and you can see hope at the end of the rainbow.
I would suggest that when she does come to you wanting to reconcile the M that you have your plan of action ready to put into place....you know, for when you have the "big talk" with her. In other words, know exactly what you want from the M and what you will do and what you expect out of her as a wife and a mother. If she does not agree 100% or if there can't be a compromise about part of it.....then it won't work and she will be right back where she is now. I would also let her know that at the top of that list is no more fit throwing, and that there will be no more breaking up and going back together. B/c some women will do this off and on again and again and you don't want to live like that. They love the "game" and it is craziness.
Okay, well I will tune in for the continuing story tomorrow---same time, same channel.
Take care, Sandi
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
