Divorce looming #4

[K4D]

Stuck,

I agree. That is exactly what is happening. She has empty threats. I contacted an attorney after she threatened to press charges for me looking at the emails and she has no case in that incidence. Now she does have a case against me emailing myself her emails. But as far as she knows, they are deleted. So again, no case. Nothing to fear.

Stacy,

You are right in some aspect. I am finally enjoying holding the trump ace card adultery. For months I have taken her crap. And now I no longer am. I finally have some leverage. I'm not trying to abuse it. But I'm not getting pushed around anymore and made to feel the way she has tried to make me feel for months.

To tell the OM's W. Again, if I do, this frees up my W to have him. That is not my goal. I'd rather keep them in fear. Right now, he is avoiding her to try and not get in trouble. She is offering me all kinds of stuff to put in writing I won't say anything. You wouldn't believe what she is offering me. Its unreal. She is trying to play the psychological game of closing the door on us forever if I say something and also offering me sexual favors if I will just put in writing that I won't say anything. Truly amazing.

I will admit that the psychological game of us never being together again is having some effect on me. But at the same time, I have had this played on me before by her and have no real reason to believe that she means she will keep the door open if I agree to her terms. Its hard when that gets thrown my way as she knows more than anything I want another chance with her. I told her I am naturally weary of her comments based on past actions. At the same time, I wonder. She knew exactly where to hit me with that one. And I'm ashamed of myself for really thinking about it.

None the less, I appear to be in control for the first time in many months. And its not control I was looking for. But I have to have some leverage and start standing up for myself and what is right.

The child custody agreement was talked about before, but gets signed tomorrow first thing in the morning. Then the waiver of service. After that she is clear to follow through on the D. If she does, I consider this over in the short run. I'm going to move on. She was unfaithful multiple times.

I hope to get another chance with her down the road and I will continue to pray for one. But if someone comes along that is just spectacular, I can't say I will turn them down. I don't know what the future holds. But I'm done with this crap for now. I'm moving on. She can have her fantasies and image and everything that is so important to her. At some point she will fall into a hole. And she will turn to me. I don't know when, but she will.

I will just have to be patient until then.

Kevin