SG states the opposing view very eloquently, and I know she's sincere in her beliefs. But despite the 1,000 words on it, the bottom line is exposure WORKS, and IT'S THE RIGHT THING TO DO.
Affairs thrive on secrecy. Take away the secrecy, and the affair's already 80% dead.
Why is it the right thing to do? Because you know something, and other people who are potentially going to be damaged greatly by the illicit relationship have a right to know. Put it this way. Replace "adultery" with "larceny." If you knew someone was stealing other people blind -- including their spouse -- wouldn't you have a moral obligation to tell them?
Of all the horrible things that one person can do to another, I can't for the life of me figure out why THIS one is supposed to be kept from everyone, and we're all supposed to enable it and even tacitly approve of it. This is where Sandi and I go 'round and 'round over this: what other crime/habit/sin/behavior is treated as sacrosanct, and we're all supposed to go along? If someone had a gambling addiction or a porn addiction, and were robbing their family blind, we wouldn't think twice about intervening and doing everything we could to stop it. But when it's infidelity, we're supposed to do the Little Bo-Peep Approach: leave them alone, and they'll come home, wagging their tails behind them.
Sorry. I don't buy it. Affairs cause intense damage to families -- medically, financially, emotionally and spiritually, and innocent kids are often their collateral damage. I'll have no part of that. Aggressively busting up an affair by all means possible -- including exposure -- hastens the affair's natural death, and every month it is shortened is one less month of incredible harm to all involved.
