My actions are vindictive or in some way to hurt my W.
Right, that's my point. If you are seeking revenge, if your intent is to hurt, it will not work out well. Now if in taking care of yourself and your kids your W gets her feelings hurt, oh well. Intentions. Don't go after HER, go after what is rightfully yours.
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The terms that she has offered me are not acceptable to me. I have to figure out what my recourse is going to be. I'm still very confused about how I can protect my rights.
So you start out by seeking a L to see what is legally yours. If a 50/50 split is your legal right, then go for it. Remember she has to PROVE you are doing something that requires a protective order. Just watch recording anything. In some states the interception of communication without a person's knowledge is against the law. If the gift money is yours, go for it.
You can only control how you act and react, you can't control or predict her responses. So keep your head together (and you have been doing this, so keep going) and deal with her as rationally as possible.
My prior point is that you can't see the future. You can only deal with the information you have today. Right now it looks like she wants you out, she wants a legal S. Fine. Then proceed in a way that protects you as much as possible. If down the road you reconcile, fine. If you don't fine too. You can't control or predict the outcome at this time. So, hope for the best, prepare for the worst.
