Back in a bad place (from a former DB regular)

[Snow White]

Hi LMG.

Do you think you are jealous of your husband's relationship or do you think you are just feeling a renewed sense of lonliness becuse the realtionship you were having ended and you aren't as "ok" with yourself as you thought you were?

The reason I ask this is because my H left me in April, after me discovering his affair in Jan. I struggled, I DB'd from Jan through, I did everything I GAL'd but it was to no avail, or so it seemed, then I felt a little better but never ever really detatched. Well then sometime around the end of September a person who I knew socially from my GAL activity started contacting me and paying attention, texting, msn, talking on the phone and in a period of a few weeks I thought less and less about my husband. By mid november - 6 weeks into speaking back and forth with this guy (who knew I was committed to saving my marriage even though my husabdn was still having an affair) I decided enough is enough and told my husband now or never make a choice or I give up and I did. I thought I was stronger and I thought I had boundaries. Now, after ending the relationship with the other guy, I suddenly realize that I still have no idea how to be just me. I am in tremendous pain and feel like the big bandaid that I had das been ripped off.

See the whole year I worked on my M, then I was working on this new R, now I am working on nothing for the very first time. Are you sure this isnt kind of what you are feeling? More than jealousy?