I feel a bit silly now for making so many suggestions and somewhat explicitly . It sounds like you're already fairly bold and open-minded. I bet this one will push your comfort level, though: when you're a bit more comfortable after losing that 3.375 lbs that you claim is holding you back, and are ready for some lingerie, go for a surprise striptease by candlelight. HA! That'll get him! I think it is fantastic that you are so open and willing to try to be sexual after so many years of not being able to throw yourself in the lava pit of lusty love.
What you just wrote to Cloudnine felt like it was directed to me, absolutely. Makes perfect sense. My wife has come right out and told me before that if I backed off and didn't try to give her so much affection and attention that she might be able to pursue me more. The problem is that I've tried this with mixed results. When I don't pursue her like I've always done she notices something is wrong and mistakes it for coldness or becomes suspicious of my affections being directed somewhere else!
I can't seem to even pull off a 180. Also for it to take effect, I think that I need to be able to hold off for much longer than I can suffer through, several months it seems. Hopefully, the Paxil will give me some ability to ignore the achings of my heart and body. I can't imagine the need for soul intimacy to go away just because the physical need has relaxed a litttle. We'll see. Gaining some hope.
I'll think some more about that post to CN and how it applies to me.
. It sounds like you're already fairly bold and open-minded. I bet this one will push your comfort level, though: when you're a bit more comfortable after losing that 3.375 lbs that you claim is holding you back, and are ready for some lingerie, go for a surprise striptease by candlelight. HA! That'll get him! 
I think it is fantastic that you are so open and willing to try to be sexual after so many years of not being able to throw yourself in the lava pit of lusty love.
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