It's Complicated! Part 4

[glamgirl]

Thanks for all the support. I do not plan on contacting him. He is again out of the area during the day, so will not be available to help afterschool with s7. Probably for the best.

He said he would stop by this evening. I am just going to be nice and not mention a thing.

It was weird, he was saying I was a hypocrit and judging him, he said that I was living in the past and bringing things up that made him relive the past. He said how could I get close to you Glam.

He said he was not interested in going to church or God, since I took my own path on that years ago. This was 7 years ago that I started to go to church by myself since h didnt want to go to church, so I picked one by myself. He again threw this in my face. I said h if you want to go to church we can do that. He said no it's too late you already made choices for yourself.

Oh my gosh, it was like are you really serious here. I said h it seems as if nothing I do makes you happy. He said that is how I feel. He said nobody ever apologized to him. I said h I did apologize and I did forgive you. He said you haven't forgiven me. I also said you owe some apologies yourself. He said I am not ready.

He talked about becoming whole again and how he is not whole. He said he can't help me until he feels whole again. He said something about how he is speaking to me and not to his family and that they are blood.

Then he said something about does the past matter. We have some unfinished business, which I can move on from, but the past 3 years he has been saying he will discuss with me when he is ready. He now says he isn't sure he will ever discuss with me.

Well if the past doesn't matter, then why is he spending some much time and space entertaining it. He said that he has spent months, hours days going over the scenario in his mind of what happened and why and all he can conclude is that his family and I stabbed him in the back.

Obviously I can't help my h right now. He will need to see that things were said under stress, high emotions and that just because things were said and done that were NOT loving at the moment, doesn't mean that I don't love him.

Lot's to sort through. I try to sort out what he is saying, but maybe I should't even try at this point. It's his perspective not mine.

I guess I will just continue to be kind and love unconditionally. What else can I do?