Just catching up with everyone. Grr to your latest developments.
First and foremost you need to protect yourself financially. I'm not sure about who's paying for all your household stuff since he left but for d@mn sure he should be at least splitting it with you! And running up his credit cards and paying them from a joint account?? That cr@p has to stop immediately.
I'm mildly worried about xBF spending a lot of money on OW before I get my settlement but right now am counting on his frugality and not getting a bonus this year to curb that. But after talking to my friend who is xBF's coworker today, I realized that I need to get my money sitch under control now before anything could happen with his job and a large chunk of my financial future.
There's a difference between taking a spouse to the cleaners out of spite and fighting for what you're entitled to for being in the M. I think you're in the latter category and as long as you can honestly tell yourself that then you should stand up for what's yours. My thinking is this: if you (xBF) want out, fine, but I will demand to have my half of the future I thought we were going to have and I will not settle for less.
If you love somebody, set them free. http://tinyurl.com/2empx2g
