I guess I want to add, that I might have considered dating this guy if he would have been a little more intelligent...it sounds awful, but I do want and admire an educated man with brains !!
Nothing wrong with that at all, Cinders.
I'm not trying to give dating advice but if that does come time when you are past your H (I am realizing that as long as I am not over my W, I can't date), be very picky, i.e. you should go after the kind of qualities and traits that you find desirable. Whether it be a church-going Christian, intelligent, friendly, kind, person or someone with other traits, don't settle for less. I firmly believe if you leave it up to God, He will lead you where He knows you should be.
A note of caution, there are a lot of hurting people out there, especially when you consider that when someone is over 30, they have either been married previously or through a close relationship that probably ended badly. Intentions are hard to determine whether the person wants a "casual" relationship or a serious one.
Why does a person want a casual or a serious relationship?
They may not have properly dealt with the pain they have gone through in their life and are looking for a "solution".
To be frank, I don't want to be someone's solution. If my M is irretrievably broken, I have to trust Him to let me know and to allow Him to work in my life. I pray every day that He leads me to what He wants me to do. I know my focus has to be on the kids and protect them from unnecessary issues, such as my personal relationships. If I do date, my kids will be uninvolved. And while I know my children want me to be happy, they are not mature enough to know what that means.
LOL! I don't know if I am mature enough to know what makes me truly happy.
But He does.
I will say that if I could give one piece of advice to another (and to myself) is to not try too hard.
I think many people try too hard to be good at some area of their lives and they either spend too much time in that one area or they end up over emphasizing what they are doing, making someone else uncomfortable.
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves." -- 1 Corinthians 13:4-7
Love you so much, little sis.
mmf
Me:56, W:51 D:26,S:24,S:22 Married:18 Bomb 9/27/06 Separated 11/27/06 Divorced 10/6/08 Leaving it up to God
