Being afraid that "going dark" will only drive them away -- even into the arms of an OW/OM -- is perhaps the #1 fear/misunderstanding people have about DBing! I'm no expert, but I do know that's EXACTLY what you're supposed to do.
It's counter-intuitive, I know, but DBing is one of the most counter-intuitive things you will EVER do. It's all about making them miss you, and the fact that us humans tend to want what we can't have.
