{{{JCJ}}} Now that I have caught up- I noticed that you are still having feelings about your H. It's up to you to do what you want. You have options, you don't seem to like them - can you come up with any that might be a compromise or something different for you.
Seems that H may still have unresolved feelings as well. What do you want to do about that? What about talking to a DB counselor to assist in making any decisions? Maybe they can help you get closer to the information you need to decide what to do next.
I personally am setting goals like you suggested a long time ago. As things evolve, I am modifying the goals, making them either more specific and smaller. I modify the goals based on the results I see - noticing what works or what isn't working. I have long term goals and the modifications are on the short term ones - so the changes I make are still focused on the overall goal. Otherwise I think we could go afar from the reason we are here.
I hope this helps. If it doesn't forget it. If it does Go for it. Can't hurt anyone's feelings here. Hope I am not too nosey.
