I always used to think that I contributed a lot to the arguments between W and I, and she even used to say that whenever things were going well between us it was me who alway used to spoil things by upsetting her. But now as I take a back seat in these things and observe W's behaviour I can see that she really goes out of her way to either cause an argument or sustain one. I mean on this occasion when W told me to f**k off it was because I asked her directly why she was deliberately causing an argument when there wasn't one there. Also I now know when W is losing an argument or doesn't have a valid point she resorts to cursing as a way to deflect away from the pointless situation.
You say that I am big on patient and self control, well the truth of the matter is now having got this far if I was offered an unconditional out, I'd probably take it. But, a lot of people here on this board would give a lot to be in position I am so I have to continue along the lines of giving it my best shot.
I can see over the last couple of years that I have changed a lot but W hasn't , and I doubt she ever will and that is a big obsticle for our situation . So as we muddle through at the moment who knows what our long term future will be. ( I mean at some stage my patience may run out).
