Sorry you are here, but glad you found your way here. This site is a great source of wisdom and support, as well as a place to vent frustrations and get perspective.
My W has the notion that "behaviors can change, but fundamentally people can't change", sounds like your W subscribes to the same philosophy.
People change, feelings change - they have once they can again - just continue to take the high road and pray that your W comes to her senses.