well she now refuses to answer my phone calls about doing our taxes. i belive she thinks if sher ignores the problem long enough, it will simply go away.
She's still so immature.... no self growth even after a year. What a shame.... I always said I was better to be on my side of the fence than my H's because it forced me to make a me. Just like it bettered you.
M:47 M:18 D16, S19 1st S 1/08-5/08 Reconciled/May 7, 2008 Left again Nov 9, 2009 I Filed: Nov 17, 2009 Final: April 14, 2010 EX walked away from kids too
and thats the heart of it all i guess. when this all started i was a yelling mess who needed to change for myself and my W. well after 13 months she has moved into the abuseive section of our marrage ( passive agressive but still abusive) while i have changed. the thing to remember is this is not my W at all. i am hopeing she comes out of it and desided to work on us but we have a littel over 100 days left to our marrage. so i guess it will take a huge internel for her to do this. As i said the new her views me as a anxiety, not a benifit. we have never got back to square one. we were closer there when she before she moved out,but now the stress of a M is more then trumped by the new friends new man, new life.
well 10 days and still no friggin responce about the taxes. I guess i will file married but sepperated. God its just so damn frustrating to see how she just does not want to deal with anything that might be responcible when theres so much more " fun" things to do .
just watched the breakup on tv. Wow thats a reallife look isent it. the female carector finalyt and honestly tells ther male she dosent feel appreciated. the male says hes truly sorry and will do what ever it takes to be better. the female has nothing left to give. I guess i was a nieve guy. i thought Love was a stronger feeling and could be awakend if needed as long as the right moves were made. i thought love lasted forever. i thought wrong.
we had finaly met for coffee and taxes. Folkes we talked for 2 houres, it was soooo nice. she even called me honey 3 times! but in the end she walked away. i can see her feelings are not there buy her eyes. she gave me a hug and was gone. big strong marcum didnt cry there. he has not stopped crying since.
i dont6 see much hope anymore i guess. if i giver her space she is with the OM. if i try contact she feels pressured. i try to make the best of out time together that is the hardest part. when we get together I feel happy. we talk and there feels no wall,,,untill she feels inclined to bring it up. its always the same trap, but i wont fall for it. i just keep stepping through the mine feild waiting to get to the other side. Those honeys she gave me last week were so nice, but i almost whish she wouldn't they speak of sa hope thst isent there.
It's natural for you to take those "honey"s and hold onto them. She IS your wife and naturally you're looking for a connection, for a glimmer. Honestly, "honey" has slipped out of my mouth when I knew h didn't want it, but NOT 3 TIMES in one conversation. Last week h left a message on my phone for me to have the kids call him, but he was on his way to a call, so he may not be able to talk to them. At the end of his message...he said "bye". I SAVED that message on my phone because of that "bye". Lately, he says what he needs to and hangs up the phone when he's done. Even if he's talking to me and not my voice mail. So I really liked the "bye". I thought "See.There's his soft side."
It's just where we are in things Marcum. You and me both, we're still hoping beyong hope that something is still in them. And I truly believe it is. For both of us. It's just a matter of whether or not they are willing to look at it and acknowlege it. It's painful, and truthfully they may avoid it for as long as time. It's nothing we can do or say or convince them of. We are only in control of ourselves. Take care.
Me 36 Husband 35 D5 S2 separated: 10/29/07-present Served divorce papers 1/22/09 "When the world gives out beneath your feet, it is time to learn how to fly."
