I know if X showed up - having worked on himself and wanting to date again that I would be all over it.
BUT--- in moving forward the realization that he is not even there yet becomes stronger and stronger.
AND-- the fact that if he didn't I will be ok and moving forward is what I am suppose to do... that is strange.
How is it really, that we loved so deeply and that love wasn't enough? i know I know no 2x4 just wondering. So many people just give up, quit. LOVE --- it really really is commitment.
The further away from the bomb and from being married etc the truth about love has become more and more evident to me. Loving somenoe is awesome - at least it was for me. BUT REAL LOVE means that even if i don't "feel" it you the person I love are WORTH it. Worth being respected, treated with honor - and just honest with.
LOVE itself does change and grow. AND committment is what glues it together. There are times LOTS AND LOTS of times when you can think this isn't worth it - this stinks....but once you have made that committment to love - you dont quit.
It is like a great friendship---- some are worth it -- worth working through.
i know early morning ramblings.....
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
