MIP, So sorry to hear about the D papers. As you can see I was given D papers not that long ago either. At first, I freaked out. I was an emotional wreck and I felt like I was spiraling out of control! For me if felt like, ok, this is really happening.
All I can say is that you really have to try and keep the changes going regardless if he notices them or not. Most likely he DOES see them, but wont say anything. I know my H is big into not giving me false hope. Just recently he acknowledged some of the changes..but you know what--when he actually did, I thought I would be happy and all I could think of was "I know, I dont need YOU to tell me that."
Don't get me wrong, I love my H and most days I want our M to work. Just recently I had a revelation and decided that my life was going to go on regardless if we D or not. I am trying to look at the positives in both situations and I encourage you to do so as well. Be careful to not revert back to your old ways of thinking. I backpedaled and started to become desperate and clingy again after I got the D papers. I have since regained control.
Like mentioned above (and I had to see for myself) They are just papers and its just a date. Things can always change between now and then. Or they may not..but try to prepare yourself for either scenario. My thoughts are that my H felt the need to file because he wanted me to know he is serious. So I finally just started agreeing with him and told him if its what he wants then I will do whatever it is he needs to move on. Someone gave me the advice and said to just let him vent, bite your tongue and just act like you agree to what he is saying. Ive told my H a million times that I love him, i dont want to D, and I want to make it work. He gets it so I leave it alone now.
Maybe you can read through my sitch a little, there is some wonderful advice and its helped me. I hope it helps you too!
