Thanks for that guys it really helps to know that there are people around who are willing to offer me the support I need. I've got my family and mates obviously and I am constantly talking thier ears off but at times I feel that they don't really know how I am feeling in this whole sitution and I sometimes get the feeling that thier just fed up of me talking about it. It's helpful knowing that I'm not alone in this and can talk to people who are in a similar situation.
On the violence side of things I gotta admit that I have been told by several people now that I gotta call the police if it happens again, my mom actually told me after the first instance that I should do it but I dont know it just doesn't seem right. It's happened twice since and I've let her off, if it happens again, which I think it probably will, I'll be truthful I just don't know if I could. I really don't know if this is true, but I've been told that here in the UK it's standard police policy that they will always take the male away - even if it's the woman hitting the guy and its the guy who phoned to report it they will still take him away to try and defuse things. As I say don't know if thats true but one of my mates said he heard a phone in on the radio the other day and thats what they said.
Someone else??? If I'm truthful I really don't think there is. That could just be me being naive (if thats how you spell it)I don't know, I just can't see when she'd be seeing this possible other guy as she doesn't go out all that much and if she does she takes our daughter with her. I admit that this thought has crossed my mind many a time but when she tells me that theres nobody else I do believe her. She used to talk to one of my mates a fair bit when this all started in the hope that she could get him to make me understand that it's over and he's also 99% certain that theres nobody else. She's often said that if there was it would probably make things easier to explain.
On the subject of me living in my house I can categorically state that I ain’t going anywhere voluntarily again! I moved back in almost 3 weeks ago now and feel totally at home and if anything it’s the wife who’s skulking around feeling uncomfortable. Before I went to my parents I’d spent the previous 6/7 weeks sleeping on the sofa but when I came home I insisted that I was going back in the bed and she’s now sleeping on a blow up bed in our daughters room. She had a situation whereby they’d alternate between the bed and the blow up bed but my daughters effectively told her to sod off now and insisted that she’s gonna sleep in her own bed every night. She’s told her mom that theres a perfectly good bed in mom and dads room and if mom don’t want to sleep in it that’s her own fault! I’ve told my wife that I’m not stopping her from sleeping in our bed and have assured her that if we were to share the bed again I would not touch her but she’s having none of it. I’m being truthful there as well, if we were in the same bed I definitely wouldn’t try it on for fear she’s got a knife under the pillow lol!
I’m not sure what the laws are here in the UK as to whether or not she can get me removed so I’m gonna try to arrange a meeting with a solicitor as soon as I can just so that I know where I stand.
If the worst comes to the worst and she does see this through then yeah I am going for custody. My daughter said to me weeks ago that the way she see’s it is that we’ve got 2 options i) 1 person happy (mom) and 2 people unhappy (us) or ii) 2 people happy (us) and 1 person unhappy (mom). It may well be the philosophy of a child but kids see things as they are and its either black or white! My daughter blames her mom for the whole situation as she knows that I want the same thing as her which is us all together as a happy family again and she’s knows that it is her mom who is the one stopping all of that from happening. My daughters also said that she thinks she would be happier living with me as opposed to her mom as we’ve always had a very strong bond and it’s always me that spends more quality time with her having fun and playing games. She’s the typical daddy’s girl I’ve gotta admit! My wifes trying to change this now and is spending more time with our daughter but our daughter see’s straight through it, doesn’t think it will last and tells me she thinks mom’s only doing it so that she agrees to live with her. Reasons enough for me I think.
Oh dear, just noticed the clock and it’s after 2 am (again!) so gonna have to call it a night I think and try to get some sleep.
Really glad I found this place and will probably be spending a fair amount of time on here I reckon.
One last thing, in answer to your question Kev yeah I am in the UK and I live in Birmingham.
