M, Actually your could say, "h, I'm going to try to give you your half of the tax return, but I've got to first get the car up and running so that son and I can have transportation for work, etc. H, if this isn't acceptable, then maybe we need to start thinking about looking into us having the use of your car more or you assist in running the errands, etc."
It's time for him to step up to the plate M, you've done everything humanly possible to keep your family up and running while he's sitting in the dark playing a mushroom. I think he's paralyzed and needs a jolt of something and that something could very well be money...notice his interest in the tax return. BTW, why is he so interested in that return any way?
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
