Please, I need some expert DBing advice. I think I just had a clash of therapy and I don't know what to do. So today I had a phone therapy session and brought up to the T about having sex with H again. Yes, again. For those of you who've been tracking my sitch one of my goal is to not have sex with H. But this morning I was home from work and he was working in the area. He stopped in for breakfast and then he started to kiss me. And I tried soooooo hard to resist. I kept say no stop this isn't right and he kept persisting until I gave in and let go. I know I'm a sucker and I absolutely hate it. Anyway, so I told my T about what happened and his advice to me was that I keep letting H off the hook and that I'm not asking him what his intentions are for us. I kept arguing with him that my book says that I shouldn't be the one to bring up the status of the marriage, until he does. And the therapist kept saying that as his wife I have a right to ask these things. Then I said that I don't want to pressure the situation. He has to come around to wanting the marriage. He agreed but he thinks I should still be inquiring about H's intentions about us. Of course I would love to know H's intentions but I also feel like I don't want to rush or add pressure. I wish H would say that he's ready to come home, but should I be the one asking about what his plans are. But I don't think he has a plan right now. I said to the T that all he is going to say is that he doesn't know, and then what? Where would that leave us. I don't want to be waiting but do I have a choice?
So after talking with T I called H, stupid stupid stupid. I talked about why I don't want to have sex b/c although it feels good he is cat eating and having two women and I know that he loves me but he wants both of us, blah blah blah. All he said was ok we won't do anything again., and then I got frustrated becasue he wasn't saying what I wanted to hear and it was a frustrated conversation about nothing.
Anyway, I just want don DBers thoughts please. Should I really be asking H about his intentions for us? I feel like I just want to continuing to GAL and let it be. I know the sex is not good b/c it allows H to cake eat and then he thinks that I'll always be hooked on him. T thinks that by not putting some pressure on H that he will continue this for a long time. Thoughts pleaseeeee.
