I hear what you are saying. There are nights when Nathan asks for his dad (last night he wanted to know when Dad was coming over, I told him it wasn't Daddy's day, he said but Daddy ALWAYS comes over every night...), but there are nights when I am sure if I didn't bring it up, they wouldn't ask.
The comment about us calling him came last summer. Dan was in selfish mode and he would call at 9:30 and be upset that the kids were already in bed. The 'set' bedtime is 8:30; that is the norm. But on occasion if we have traveled to visit family, or went out to dinner after karate, etc., sometimes it varies from that. But not by much.
Anway I realize that I don't need to have the kids call Dan on "my" nights. I guess it is just the pattern we set up before we separated and neither of us has changed it at this point.
so, did the storm materialize and allow you to get an early out and an advance on your w/e?
i hope more snow is coming our way to the east but I did not notice any mention of any for us in the 5 day
I have been holding you guys up in prayer .. my sponsor family with the Lord. I feel like that my long standing prayer that I ask the Lord for regarding myself is slowly but surely coming to pass(most of my prayer time is about others ..too wierd for me to pray for myself much). I have prayed off & on that He help me to be more of a leader. If He can do it for me then He can do much for Dan. And I will pray that He does. This has been like this for you guys for too long. I am even thinking about getting vociferous in my prayers for you guys. Whatever it takes ..right.
Have a nice night and a terrific w/e. Tune out the riff raff and be in a comfortable place for you BBJ. I know you are and will continue to be fine.
Quick update-- Spent the weekend with the kids. We made heart-shaped meatloaf on Friday, heart-shaped cookies Sat. afternoon, and heart-shaped pizza Sat. night. I think we got it all covered there...
Dan came over for an hour yesterday to give the kids their cards and candy. Nothing for me and I got nothing for him. So be it. Didn't expect anything.
Then he called an hour later (he spent yesterday with 3 hired guys demolishing the inside of his house) to say he was going into the city, did I need anything? I joked he should bring me back starbucks.
This morning he showed up at the house before church, carrying a fresh cup of starbucks caramel macchiato (jealous Kalni?).
The church message was all about doing what is right in God's eyes instead of doing what seems/feels right to the world. Pastor referenced Romans 7, (I do what I don't want to do, and I do not do that which I want to do). Anyway after the sermon during communion Dan had the Bible and I saw he was reading Romans 7 for himself...
After church he came over, finished shoveling the driveway for me. Then he played with the kids, then he put the hangers on the back of a picture frame for me which I have been meaning to do.
After he left he came back to the front door. Brought in a plastic mat/tray thing to put your shoes in by the front door when they are snowy/muddy. I have been using a towel and commented a while back about the mess. He said, "I saw this in the city and thought you might want it".
He is very AOS (acts of service) in his LL. And he was full of service today...
Oh and to treat myself last night I had a glass of my favorite wine, and went to bed with both kids cuddling me. Yay me!
Wow Bobbi, that made me really sad reading that. I see the struggle in him. Clearly the message got to him in Church and he continues to try, despite how painful and hard it is for him perhaps. I know its hard for you too, but you have better tools than him and thats shown with the way you are handling this.
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
Thanks guys. It was a regular 'family day' today...
H left for about 2 hours to go back to his project and then met up with us at karate, covered in drywall dust. He came back to our house after karate and proceeded to grill some flank steaks (fajita meat, but we just grill it up and eat it like steak sometimes). So we all ate dinner together, he was teasing me about some home-repair stuff I had done without him. Our typical interactions in our M were a lot of smart-a$$ teasing/banter and it was kind of like that. I literally kicked him in the butt over something he said. It felt nice to just be playful and relaxed instead of tense.
He stayed until almost 9.
Tomorrow is Sydney's dr. appointment for her eyes. I think I have mentioned it here but she has a strange condition called Horner's Syndrome, where one pupil is much larger than the other. We had cat scans and MRIs when she was 6 months old to rule out brain tumors. Thankfully she didn't have that. But we go every 6 months to make sure things aren't getting worse and she won't need a patch or glasses.
The smaller pupil is the problem, both pupils constrict in bright light, but only one fully dilates in darkness. So in evening light or just a darkened room, they are VERY different in size. Also b/c a nerve is involved, she doesn't sweat over the affected eye. Interesting, huh?
Anyway tomorrow is the 6 month check and we are at a new doctor since we no longer visit her K.C. doctor. Wish us luck!
You are always so darn busy. Must be neat having a family.
SOunds like your w/e was very pleasant. I am happy for you and those received blessings.
And with regards to the Horner's syndrome thingy. I am sorta familiar ,not with that particular malady, but a whole buch of other one's.
just to give you a taste of the medical terminology acumen i now posess since my darling has come into my life.
try this one on for size ... Congenital Hemolytic Anemia/ Hereditary Spherocytosis.
the cut to the chase version is an extremely rare blood disorder (of Eastern European origins I believe) which causes there to be mishapen red blood cells which because of their abnormal shape wreaks havoc on all the blood filtration organs of the body casing them to have to be removed over time ..one after the other. We often joke about how my darling (as well as my SD20 unfortunately)has a hollow torso from all the removed stuff. She was born under the wrong star or somethin'.
Dr. appointment was okay, actually I was very disappointed. My little princess needs glasses! I know it is not a big deal, I wear contacts myself. But I didn't get glasses until high school. She is only 2 1/2! The doc said she has mild far-sightedness but the larger concern is astigmatism in one eye. He said it makes the cornea shaped like a football instead of a basketball....
Anyway I need to call him back we didn't discuss it much we were there for 2 hours of exams and then we had 3 minutes of "yep she needs glasses here is the prescription and a list of eye glass stores" and then we were scooted out for the next patients...
I would like to know if she needs them all the time or not since it is far-sighted, that means close up stuff. When she is playing outside, swimming, watching a movie on television, etc. she is not using her 'close up' vision. I know I was the opposite I only had to wear glasses for far-away things like reading notes on the chalkboard, driving, watching movies, etc.
Nothing new on the Dan front. He was very nice Sunday and did a lot to help me out, I posted about that before. But Monday night all we talked about after the kids went to bed was finances. We are finally starting to separate everything out. Which I find a little saddening for me, b/c if his end goal is us being together then why are we separating everything out? Oh well, it is what it is. He maintains he does want us to work things out but there is no plan of action for making it happen. So I do my thing, he does his.
Took Nathan to karate last night, he earned another stripe for 8 sessions at the orange belt level. He tests again in two weeks for his yellow belt.
Whatever it takes ..right.
