Man, this is EXACTLY what I have been dealing with! All this about not being able to even mention the sex issue and the “cuddle until she falls alseep, then lay there for a few hours with your heart pounding and mind reeling”.
The only conclusion that I can come to so far is that there is no conclusion. Live in the pain of rejection by the one that you’ve given your heart, soul and body to. This situation is really getting to me. I feel sick to my stomach. My wife just told me I was shallow and barbaric to want sex. What can you say to that?
Somehow really, the only thing I can do is wait indefinitely, at her mercy, at the whims of her hormonal balance, for some miracle to change her heart.
I've thought about contacting my wife's doctor regarding this issue but I am afraid that even a suggestion or a question from him would be traced back to me. Even if the doctor didn't tell her I had concerns she would just assume that I was meddling. Her mindset has become so warped that no matter who would tell her that she needed to consider this issue (including her doctor, best friends, father or mother, sister, whatever) she will not seek help for our relationship. Yet she claims that she loves me dearly, more than I love her. This is so bizarre. I don't know what to make of it anymore. She is in major denial.
I know I’m supposed to be working on my attitude and trying to find ways of being happy without a “relationship” but I’m finding it painfully out of reach. I would do anything for her to love me again. After a decade and a half I still feel butterflies when I see her walking towards me. Crazy. How can I be so in love with someone that causes me so much pain?
