Thankyou for visiting. I love popping by and seeing you guys and hearing from you.
naej.....
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Will you still go out for drinks and meals with him? I can't believe he didn't say anything. It is all so civilised, thats what got me so mad with my x.
I'm not really sure about going for drinks and meals with him..... I think I would, as we're supposed to be friends, but at the same time I'm not going to actively pursue the friendship while he's with the aubergine. I told him that not being able to discuss that big part of his life would make it difficult to be good and close friends, but he didn't seem to understand why that might be. I guess that there wasn't much left to say after the whole D conversation really. I just feel a bit sad for him- he's so lost- and I'm not angry. You live and learn don't you? No regrets.
mishka- thankyou for thinking of me. The tests are happening next Thursday. I don't think it's anything to be too worried about (although obviously neither the doctor nor the consultant agree!). I'll let you know what happens if they make a diagnosis (don't want to worry anyone with potential diagnostic options as I'm not worried myself).
Michelle- what would you like to know? H and I had the conversation initially over the phone with me angry and aggressive. I was NOT doing good DBing! It then continued more calmly the next day- we met at Starbucks, and then finished the conversation even more calmly a couple of days after that when he came to the flat to collect some of his things. It was odd because he was pretty hard about it at first, then upset, then resigned, then seemed sad. I was very upset after the first conversation but had regained my balance by the next day and was able to tell him how I feel/felt about things calmly and (I think) using neutral language. He just wasn't able to step up, or to express any opinion/feelings/anything himself which was disappointing but not unexpected given previous behaviour. Anyway, let me know what you want to know and I'll do my best to furnish detail.
So, today I moved our big office down into a little office for two and a half- me, CEO and part-time one other person (probably Cockney geezer). It's so wierd after being in such a big office, but it all had to be done quickly so there wasn't much time to dwell on it. CEO is still working on trying to secure my position and I'm keeping my fingers crossed that he manages to do it. He's so good- trying to take care of me.
Meanwhile some friendly guys have moved in to the office next door. They pop by during the day to have tea with me, or to say hello, which is nice. Tomorrow one of them has invited me to go to Borough Market with him for lunch and they've all invited me to join them for a drink after work. I haven't decided if I'll go yet but it's nice to be asked.
And finally, since this is the DB website, I think it's 3(?) weeks since I heard from H. I don't have any reason to contact him so I'm not going to as long as I don't have to. I was just pleased that I can't remember how long it's been since we had any contact, and I'm not bothered by it. Hurray!
You sound good. It's amazing, but at the same time not surprising, that he doesn't understand that you would rather not talk about the PP. It just shows the depths of his lostness, I think!
I don't like hearing about potential health issues! I know that last Spring even though I didn't think there was anything too serious going on, having just a liver biopsy was pretty scary. And waiting for the results was the pits!
If you need to moan about with someone, you know a few ways to find me!
I think I need to get some new socks.... I see the competition is heating up!
There's no competition in the sock department- you're always the winner there!
With H, I think maybe I was unclear..... I said to H that him having a whole area of his life that he didn't feel able to talk about with me (ie what he does at weekends, if he went to the cinema, whether he ever does anything fun, who his friends are these days, how the aubergine is etc.) would make it more difficult to have an open and honest friendship. He thinks that mentioning her might upset me, but really, it wouldn't any more. It is what it is, and I've known he's with her for a long time. I told him that. He didn't say anything. So maybe he's not THAT lost after all. Who knows!
I'll drop you an e-mail tomorrow and we can talk socks and men and blood sugar- read your post but it's late and I'm exhausted from shifting boxes and shredding things!
(((((Lisa))))) I see what you mean about H. Still, to think that you could be a normal "friend" to someone that you didn't want to talk about your life isn't "normal"!
I don't really have much to add because it sounds like you are doing so well already.
I really don't understand your H. The way you describe him it definitely sounds as though he is not happy with what he is doing and how things have ended up with you, yet he is not saying/doing anything about it. On the positive side sounds like you are doing OK with this all anyway, and have moved forward emotionally.
Does he have all his stuff from your house now? Are there any more "reasons" why you will need to see him? I understand you are fine without seeing him, just curious whether he might try to keep in touch.
So maybe we should switch to CEO now. If you are keeping a job working for him, would this preclude any dating/getting together? Are you still as interested as you were before?
By the way I LOVE Borough Market. I think it is one of my favorite places in London.
Glad to hear that you are doing so well, even with the difficult circumstances.
ITH
Me:34 H:36 M:5 years T: 8 years Bomb: 07/17/08 I want to be separated for 6 months--I don't know what I want the outcome to be S 07/28/08-11/08/08 Living together ~7 months D Possibly busted?!?!!!
Did you go to lunch with the guy from next door? Are you going out tonight? Details, details girl! Don't leave me hanging! You know, I keep saying it, but I have to live vicariously through those here who have a life!
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
