When I finished typing her letter in, I was able to detach enough from the feelings to look at the typewritten version on the board.
And I was able to read between the lines.
I have changed so much on this journey that I feel like I'm looking at it with fresh eyes. I see the depression hiding behind the claims of "happiness".
"...am and will be happier..."? Not "I am happier". Believe none of what you hear and half of what you see....
"I hope...you...find someone who can truly love you back..." The guilt of wanting to feel something for me when she can't feel something for anything is eating away at her.
When you're done, you're done- why do I need to discuss the taxes with her if she's filing separately?
When you're DONE, you're DONE...no need to thumb through old pics of your honeymoon!
She's not done. She's grasping at straws trying to get away from what she THINKS is the problem.
I feel so badly. Not for me- for her. I so just want to reach out to her to tell her that it's going to be okay. To comfort her.
But it's her journey, and for the first time in our R, I can't do a damn thing to help her.
I feel like someone would feel if they were tied down and forced to watch their loved ones tortured.
PATIENCE AND FORTITUDE CONQUER ALL THINGS. -Ralph Waldo Emerson
DBing and MLC take their toll....Please provide exact CHANGE. -Jimbo
