WAW - Very confused and devestated - pt 2

[AnotherNightmare]

CIP,

volleydog is right. She knows what you feel, believe me. There is no point in reitering that over and over again. She told you that it is your turn now, because she has been going through the same feelings for the last few years. So she knows your feelings.

You need to make any conversation with her about her, not about you. Everything else is about you, not her. You keep hearing the same advice from everybody here, because you keep thinking about how you can make the R with her better, how you can please her more, how you can make her come back to you and continue this M. The simple truth is you cannot make her do anything. You can be loving, kind and compassionate about how you treat her, but you need to stop worrying about her and start worrying about you.

Start thinking about how you (yourself) can be happy again (with or without her). Do not let anything she says or does affect you. And stop the physical contact with her. Ultimately it is pursuing and it is pushing her away. And it probably hurts you more than anything else, because for men, physical contact typically means emotional intimacy and closeness, and you get upset if she turns around and says you have never been farther away from her. If she really enjoys it, she will come to you and ask for it. If she does not, it does not do you any good anyway.

Really, you need to get the part about focusing on yourself into your mind. Face the realities, she does not want to be with you right now, so grant her her wish. If you want to save your M, make yourself the best possible option, become an independent man she is attracted to. And if she is not or does not become attracted to you ever again, at least you will be attractive to somebody else.

Hang in there! You can do it. You can save yourself. And you must save yourself first, if you want to save your M.

AN