Just be careful confused, I did the same thing your are doing when I first heard the Bomb. It seems you are trying to be the perfect H. Don't go over board. I would stop initiating all hugs and kisses. My XW has stated that it drove her nuts when I completely switched into panic mode and was kissing her a$$ for months. She sais it actually drove her further away!
CZ946,
You bring up a good point. I thought I was starting to see some signs of how she wasn't appreciating the things that I am trying to do as a "perfect" husband.
Last nite, when I sat on the couch near her, she reached over with with leg and rested them against mine. I rubbed/caressed her foot and calf lightly and asked if she wanted to use the "sensual oil" candle that we had used before for massages. She said that the candle was upstairs, and I responded that we could grab it when we bring the kids to bed.
I wound up bringing it down when I had to run upstairs for something else before the kids went to bed. After the kids came back down, I noticed the candle wasn't lit, so I asked if she still wanted to use it. She said she just hadn't had a chance to light it. I lit and and brought it over. When it was lit for a while, I asked if it was ready. She said yes and I gave her a full body massage. She gave me a hug afterwards, but not much acknowledgement. Mentally I made the note of waiting for her to ask for now on.
Perhaps this is what my therapist warned me of, that I may try so hard, that I would get frustrated/angry to the point where I will want to walk away to.
It does hurt and makes me angry at the same time.
Me 41 WAW 36 S 3&7 M 10 yrs W files D 1/9/09 W moves out 4/18 Lost job 6/15 New job 7/27 Disc PA 8/10 (started Nov 2008!) Confronted 8/11 Admits PA & appologies for hurt 9/11 Lost Job 11/13
