I need to listen to what she's trying to tell me, and look inside and see what's true. I do need to work on listening, communication, conflict management, and compassion. These are skills I need to improve upon no matter who I'm married to.
It's easy to distract myself from my work that needs to be done, by focusing on the sleeping elsewhere issue, and my W's imperfections. I'm not saying that I'm responsible for her sleeping elsewhere, or that I deserve that.
You do need to explore these things CL...I think each of us can always benefit from being aware of each new layer of weakness in ourselves, and continuously working to overcome said weaknesses. That said (and in keeping with a DR principle), have you ever communicated your expectations and desires to your W regarding your M? Have you given her a clear opportunity to understand her role in working on the R? Just curious.
Quote:
She wrote me in a recent email that we both need to move on from the hurt and anger of the past, and relate in a more constructive way.
This is 100% true. Does she see herself as actively working on this? I think you are.
Matilda's 5LL question is a good one...speaking wrong languages could definitely be a problem. It's a fast, easy, entertaining read. I wholeheartedly encourage you read it soon.
