You know it's funny, we are told not to snoop and I understand why. But sometimes I think if I have never snooped I would be really naive to a lot and I wouldn't have moved on as much. Everytime I find something out it helps me let go more and more.
Not that I am advocating snooping, especially if you want to save your marriage. Because now I know too much and I don't think I could ever get past what he has done and take him back. So for all those who really want their marriage back one day, take it from me, don't snoop. It just dampens that desire.
This makes total sense to me. I'm not in the OP sitch, but have seen so much about snooping on this site and have thought, hey, if you want to reconcile, then DON"T LOOK....but if you want to find something out to decide whether you want to stay M, or divorce and if you know that an A will mean the end of your M and if you are okay with that, go ahead and get it over with....it's the ones who want all the details and also want to stay M, that I don't get. I mean if h said he had an A and that it was a total nightmare and he always only wanted me and regretted it that second...I GUESS it could help but see, that does not happen. I also would not want to know about a one time drunken event...something h immediately regretted, etc.
I know I could have made a stupid error in the past and at times almost did, but had good gf's around who watched out for me when we partied. SO, if something had happened and I managed not to chuck myself off a bridge the morning after, I would NOT want h to know and I sure would not tell him just so I could get out of feeling guilty...no point in him knowing something so meaningless AND stupid on my part. Now I'm babbling....
that's my two cents...and Amyc...missing your posts girl!
(( j ))
Do I even make sense?
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
