I'm really anxious and nervous right now. I just got a call from my W, I could tell she was down, so I asked her if she was doing all right. She said no and that she wanted to talk to me tonight. Didn't want to get into it over the phone. In my gut I feel that she is going to finally say that she's decided for sure to file. I feel like I've been kicked in the stomach. I don't know why I'm so bothered by this, she's moving out at the end of the month, she hasn't done anything more than just act like my friend (in a WAS sort of way), so I should expect this but I am nervous and upset. We had some really good family times the past week or so. On Monday she even cooked me dinner. She's been saying she wished we could win the lottery so that we could travel together and "just be" without trying. But I just don't think that what she wants to talk about tonight is her wanting to get back together. Tomorrow is our D's 5th b-day, and I don't want to ruin it for her, but I am afraid of how I will react if my W says she's decided to file. What should my response be? I love her with all my heart and I still cry about losing her at least once a day. I'm just not ready for this. I know that when I am hurt I respond with very hurtful things, which I don't want to do tonight, but I'm afraid I won't be able to control my emotions. Please give me some guidance.
