Well, I'm getting more and more things put away, but getting settled has consumed my time as of late, so I haven't been doing much for myself except for allowing myself to collapse after going through boxes every night. At this point, small victories are the best thing for me.
I sent XW an e-mail yesterday thanking her for picking up the Valentine's Dance tickets for D and I for Friday then I mentioned what we have to finish financially in order to be through.
She wrote back and did preface by saying she wasn't trying to "piss me off" but she was going to be "straight-forward and blunt." Well, needless to say, she was very bitchy and accusing me of purposly changing the mortgage behind her back in order to decieve her and avoid paying the full mortgage. She complained that my lack of payment caused us to not make any profit on the house and said I owe her $1150 for her half of what we "would have made if I hadn't been "decietful" w/the mortgage and had kept up w/my "court ordered" payments of the mortgage and property taxes.
She also said we should try to work out the pension information w/out the 3rd party between us to save the cost and lastly, about the ring, asked "do you want me to sell it when the economy is so sh!tty or wait until things rebound?" Another direct attack on me.
Anyway, I sighed and replied to her e-mail and was open and honest. I realize it won't do any good, but I felt good w/getting my side of the story out. If she persists in the future, I can simply say "I've explained my side of this issue, so I'm asking you to please stop bringing it up. What is done is done and we need to move forward."
I told her of my debt incurred by living alone in the house as well as the divorce. I told her that working w/the mortgage company was done to avoid foreclosure which benefitted her. I informed her it was either re-work the house payments or not pay child support and I didn't want to not support my D.
I told her if she feels she's owed money, I'd pay her the $1150, but she'll have to wait in line w/my other creditors. I said I'd like to at least know what the going price for the ring is so we can make a decision. I let her know that the only way we can accurately divide up the pensions was to use the outside source, so that is something we need to do.
I finished w/the following, which may have been a waste of time, but I felt it needed to be done:
Quote:
I hope you were able to read this in the spirit it was written. I wish I could stop you from wasting energy on being angry, upset and disapppointed with me. It is unfortunately wasted energy because I already fully know you've moved on past me w/lightening speed and there isn't much I can do to make you happy anymore.
I'm tired of fighting w/her and can only pray for the day when the money things are settled so I can be completely free. Truly on my own w/out things for her to yell at me about.
Maybe she'll get it, maybe not. I don't know and although it was probably a waste of time, I did feel good sending it.
There is no reply and I don't expect to have one, but I am going to send a follow up today and tell her that I'm fine w/her shopping around for another pension attorney for us to use if that would make her feel more comfortable.
So, that was my latest and other than that, there isn't much to report. I feel bad that I've not been the best dog owner to my little guy as I've been stuck w/the transition. I know he's not happy and I'm hoping to use the up-coming long weekend to work w/him and get back into a routine for us again.
