No your question isn't stupid but there is no "quick recap" to my sitch, lol.
He has never had another woman through all this.
Things changed when I reached a point within myself where I didn't care what happened anymore.
I just wanted to end up wherever God wanted me to end up and with whomever He wanted me to be with and even if He wanted me to stay alone, that was fine with me. A lot of frustration led me to that point. More than I can convey. One day I lost my give a damn. That was how desperate I was for peace. I quit caring about anything but seeking THAT and I just wanted to live.
The burden to "save" my marriage left me. And with that, I was free from fighting anymore - and I was SO TIRED after 3 years of fighting!
I guess something changed in my interactions with Jeff after that because shortly thereafter we started hanging out and I've even spent a couple nights with him when both kids were elsewhere. Now we're starting this thing where we're doing stuff together and making plans to go places - things we NEVER did before - and who knows where it goes from here? I don't have, want or need an agenda because I will be fine no matter what.
Telling myself for so long that I had nothing to lose, so I'd better give it my all - was detrimental to me over time because I failed to realize when I had nothing left and I just kept on going. Last September/October I hit the wall though. By November things were changing. It's insane. I have no idea what the heck happened and would love to one day hear Jeff's version of how/why things changed - lol.
