This past Friday night I called to talk to the kids and Talked to the W. I could tell she was stressed big time, our S is in an accelerated class at school and has like three projects due this week (yes bragging a little on my S :)). I told her if she needed any help this weekend to give me a call.
So S calls Saturday morning to see if I'm coming over, I said maybe let me talk to Mom. So I ask her if she wants me to come she said S does, I waited.........didn't say anything.......Then she says sure it would help if you came. Now comes a HUGE 180 for me I told her I could come over later and watch the kids if she wanted to get out of the house, we used to always fight during the beginning of the S about her saying she didn't have time to go out with me but would go out with friends (very rarely)when I had the kids. I could tell she was VERY surprised with my offer.
So we decided for me to come about 5 to help S with a school project and she would make dinner. It was a great night, nothing big happened it was just nice.
As I have said before the hard part for me is that it FEELS like she wants to "move forward" but then she starts protecting herself...I know she is having trust issues with me and doesn't want to get hurt again. I see small things but sometimes I get frustrated and just want to yell "TAKE A CHANCE"...I don't I always wait till I'm in the car on the way home :).
Another thing I've been trying to do is tell her about my day, work, ect. One of her issues with me is I didn't tell her these things I would always wait till she asked me about things. The hard part with this is I don't know where to draw the line I don't want to tell her things if she isn't interested but I want her to know I'm willing to share.
One day at a time I guess...
Me:40 W: 39 T: 17 years M: 15 years S-9 D-6 D final 11/10/2009
"We are all faced with a series of great opportunities brilliantly disguised as insoluble problems."
