Well I had a week that started off well from a great weekend with my wife & kids and then I went away on a business trip and when I got back she was very cold, withdrawn, borderline angry, etc. I asked her if everything was ok and why she was acting the way she was (smart a$$ comments, poor attitude, etc.) and she told me she can feel anyway she wants to feel. It basically threw me for a loop, it's hard to stay on this rollercoaster, 1 weekend she is angry, another she is happy. When I got back from my trip, I had the kids for a few days last week and I asked her if she could watch the kids for a couple of hours in the evening while I went to the gym (hadn't gone in a while), she came by and watched them but was still cold & distant - didn't know why. I went to the gym, did my thing, came back and tried not to pay attention to her bad behavior. The next day same thing, I asked her if she could watch the kids for a couple of hours while I went to the gym (I've done the same thing for her countless times in the past and these were the only 2 times I had ever asked her to do this). A friend called me and asked to come by my place, I came home after the gym, told her thank you for watching the kids and told her my friend was coming over for a visit, well she flipped, got so angry and told me I could find another !@#$%$ babysitter in the future - I was like WOW!!! Totally didn't expect that response. The weekend that followed, I got rude phone calls, txt msg's, etc. I've often heard that hate & love are two shades of the same emotion but this was too much even for me. I told her I wouldn't ask her for favors anymore since she responded so poorly and she could use all the foul language & poor attitude she wanted. I also told her she would apologize for how she talked to me and her poor attitude. I haven't gotten an apology yet but she did text me this morning to ask me to say good morning to the kids and when I was dropping them off. When I didn't reply quickly at first, she texted again but this time adding "Good Morning Rob" to the same text msg she sent earlier, I then responded back telling her good morning and when I would bring the kids by.
I just don't feel like rewarding her bad behavior anymore, I'm not afraid to fight with her but won't get sucked into every pissing match just for the sake of it.
She is influenced heavily by her family & friends (I wish I had as much influence as they did), she currently lives back home with her mom & dad and she deals with a form of depression (possibly even some form of bipolar) and I know that sometimes her outbursts may be caused by these problems but I need her to know that I'm not going to shrink back into my corner and become a doormat for her to walk all over when she has these attitude changes & becomes angry.
Was standing up the right thing to do? Should I have told my friend to stay home instead of inviting him over when she may have wanted to stay a while longer?
We went from having a really great weekend last weekend filled with alot of physical intimacy to barely talking this weekend.
It's like any progress I make gets destroyed by events like this? It really is discouraging, we've been separated for 1 year & 2 months and it's times like this that I wonder if the writing is on the wall and I just don't want to read it.
Thoughts/Comments? Anyone else go through similar episodes?
