Learn how to do that? It can be as simple as learning how to say "No," to people.
Self help books, help the self help authors live in Hawaii : ).
Learn to say no. Don't say yes to anything that feels like a comittment. Learn to be selfish, after all you are worth it. Don't become so selfish no one likes you, but don't be so selfless that your a doormat.
Trust... Failure to trust others is because we don't trust ourself. Not trusting one person is fine, they usually earn that. Not trust everyone because of that one person is sad, and a reflection that you no longer trust your own judgement.
Stop beating yourself up for trusting your husband. We all have blind sides. Your's got hit and hit hard. Get over it, not every guy is untrustworthy, not everyone you trust is going to betray you, your judgement is still sound...look at your friends, you still trust them, you made good decisions about them.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
