Am very anxious about seeing H. I avoided him altogether yesterday but have to spend the day together today. Will need to keep things light-hearted, keep a smile on my face and make small talk, acting 'as if'. It's hard because I know we will have a serious R talk with C soon. Yesterday he was very aloof and acted very very distant. I have no idea why, it could be 1000 different reasons but I told myself not to make any assumptions. It might not even have anything to do with me personally. Who knows. But I am going to have a nice day, a happy day. I am writing to convince myself, can't you tell? But I am determined to have a nice day and not waste another moment wallowing in self-pity. I am telling myself, 'I can do it!'
Me:39 H:40 S:9 D:7 First Bomb ONS:June 07 Second Bomb OW: March 08 Separated: March 08 M:15 yrs T:18 yrs H deep into A with OW Achieved ACCEPTANCE May 30, 09
Hi PM, thoughts and prayers with you. Expect the worst but pray for the best.
It is like walking on egg shells everyday. Live well and try not to let your h impact you. We deserve the best.
Me 53 H 50 D16, D29 M 22 years bomb 7/08 INH - alien pod replaces H 8/08 - OW (direct report), I work there also bomb II - H moves 10/1 expose ow 10/22 D to be final 9-09
thanks for asking. I had a great day. D was not feeling very good today so part of the day was spent at home and H waited around to pick S up from a birthday party. But I told myself that it was going to be awkward and I didn't let any negative thoughts creep into my brain. I tried to be very lightheaded. Best of all, I picked the sexiest dress from my closet and put it on with full makeup and just felt terrific about myself. I showed off some clevage and thought to myself, now that H is 'free' he could have anyone but me. Eat your heart out, H!
So mentally I had the upperhand and I just kept it light all day. After dinner and TV, we tucked the kids in and he said a quick goodbye and left as usual. We are very civil to each other. He even shared some news of his work with me today and talked about news in the papers. I don't know if it's the dress or that he is in an especially good mood.
Yesterday he looked pis*ed off at me. But I was not home when he came home so I just don't know what he is thinking. Why one day he is so cold and shooting daggers from his eyes and the next day it's like everything is kinda normal. I guess it's just his MLC.
Me:39 H:40 S:9 D:7 First Bomb ONS:June 07 Second Bomb OW: March 08 Separated: March 08 M:15 yrs T:18 yrs H deep into A with OW Achieved ACCEPTANCE May 30, 09
I don't know if it's the dress or that he is in an especially good mood.
Yesterday he looked pis*ed off at me. But I was not home when he came home so I just don't know what he is thinking. Why one day he is so cold and shooting daggers from his eyes and the next day it's like everything is kinda normal. I guess it's just his MLC.
I'm betting it was the dress!!! You're doing wonderful!
I had that stuff, cranky one day and normal the next, it was almost like my H was alternating moods? Mental illness or MLC or I don't know what! I try to not worry about that anymore; I used to analyze it but a lot of it is not even related to us I think. I know sometimes when my husband is in a really foul mood he had a rough time with the kids--nothing to do with me.
I'm glad you're doing better today PM. That dress sounds like a great idea. Don't know if my W would appreciate seeing my cleavage too much though! Lol. I'm trying to use the same kind of idea though. W has just been past to pick up Wee Man and I put on a figure-hugging shirt which shows my weight loss to the best. I also never shaved today so have the sort of rugged look going. She always used to like that. Can't say I got any kind of reaction though. Still, it made me feel better about myself. It's just a shame she had to take Wee Man away again.
Me: 32, Wife: 22 Son: 2 Married: 2 years Separated: January 5th 2009
Sometimes you have to become lost before you can find yourself.
Can it work--that all sounds good. And I think cologne is great too. It hangs in the air after you're gone and everything, and I think that's really effective (for me at least) . Karen
{{PM}} Sounds like you had a GREAT day and that your PMA was going strong..I too have the hub "nice one day, crappy the next" who knows WHAT the heck that is all about?? Good thing we don't let THEIR roller coaster determine our days anymore eh??
Tawnya
Me:39 H:40 D18/S12 M20/T21 Bomb 10/11/08 One Two Three Four
Hi guys, I've got good news. I'm going to surprise my dad for his 70th birthday, bringing D with me. We can't wait. S has tests so cannot go. I called up H and told him to be here for S. We'll see what his definition of 'being here' means. But I am not thinking about him anymore, just want to bring joy to my Dad and a nice surprise. I haven't told him or Mom anything. Just got my brother who lives close to them to keep the secret then he will take us to Dad on his B-day. Can't wait as I haven't seen them since August since they live a flight away.
Me:39 H:40 S:9 D:7 First Bomb ONS:June 07 Second Bomb OW: March 08 Separated: March 08 M:15 yrs T:18 yrs H deep into A with OW Achieved ACCEPTANCE May 30, 09
Great news about your dad PM. I've not seen mine since my W left me. Him and my stepmother normally spend the winter travelling the warmer parts of Europe. He has been texting his support to me though.
I love surprising people with things like that. I arranged a surprise party for my Mum's 50th a few years back and she loved it.
I hope your H can at least take on the responsibility of looking after your son when you're away.
It's great to hear you sounding better. If you check out my thread you'll see I'm doing a little better too. Let's make it last.
Keep smiling.
Me: 32, Wife: 22 Son: 2 Married: 2 years Separated: January 5th 2009
Sometimes you have to become lost before you can find yourself.
You're doing wonderful!