Yeah, you might be right there. I just hope that I can get her to agree to a true S. Don't get me wrong, I have not always been the best husband. I can be distant and tend to deal with things by locking up and diverting my attention. While I was never abusive, I was also not very reliable. I have really worked on changing that over the past three years. I really thought back in November everything had finally paid off. But here I am again.
This book is very true in what it says about friends and family. Most of mine think I'm crazy and can't understand how I could weather this for three years and still keep fighting. Just today a friend of mine asked me "Is this worth it?" and I answered "Yes."
I have a few reasons why...
1) I love my wife. I am hurt and I am confused, but I never stopped loving her. While I will admit that some of this may be selfishness wanting to keep her. If she is truly that unhappy, and if being married to me really is the root of this, then a more selfless person would let her go.
-however-
2) I worry about the kids. When this started they just turned two years old. Now they are five. They have a solid idea of mom and dad and who we are. Though, I do agree that the current state of our marriage is not good for them, I know that divorce would be worse. Since I've been laid off I am able to spend more time with them than I could before. I think that they will be confused and devastated if we were to divorce. It has been my observation that no matter how amicable the ex-spouses may be, the children still seem to be stuck somewhere in middle without the stability of one home and one family.
