Trying to let go........with love!

[sandycay]

That said I want to address this weekend with you. Your in a bad spot this week and it happens. You know you will come out of this in a day or so or a week or so.... it is what it is and you have to process all you heard this week. Stop beating yourself up for feeling like sh@t.. it's okay to wallow in it but for only a little while ;-)

This is my take on the weekend if you don't feel like you can do it. Remember me telling you that when I was seperated that H wanted his parents to stay here at the house. Well, I didn't feel I could do it for me. I was honest with his parents and with him. That it would put me to close to him and at that point it still confused me and I just didn 't feel like it would help me with the healing that I needed to do. They both understood because of the way I delivered it. With not much emotional overture and calm exterior. It was hard and it was a 180 to do what I always did because I was always people pleaser. They totally got it. You could just ask him instead to give you a list of things that you could work on there when he's not there and shortly you'll be able to join him just not this weekend. But show him you want to help. I ended up saying that in laws could stay here for a few nights and do stuff with the kids and I alone and everyone understood.


I think the meeting next week with C is unnecessary. You don't need to hear anything else that's hurtful. You know where he stands and you'll be the first to know if he changes. The C isnt' going to be able to help him come to his senses either. I will support you if you do go but I just don't want you to be hurt. There is only hurt there so don't visit it anymore. Stop checking to see if it's there ..it is here to stay for a little while and you are in control of backing away from it.

I know it's hard. I burned myself over and over again. I wished I could have stopped it sooner....so I am just giving you the same advice I was given.

On subject of S I have something to bounce of you but won't do it here so call me.