Thank you vickyd. I appreciate the encouragement. Personally, I don't think that this is something that she wants either. Three years is a long time, but I also think if it is what she truly wanted, she would have done it a long time ago. Like I said, my biggest fear is that she has done this so many times before that she will feel that she needs to go through with it this time. Though she said that she had consigned herself to being miserable back in November when she wanted to work it out, I don't believe that. I think she truly saw it as best for the kids and also saw potential for us as a couple. But I think that when I got laid off, it put us right back into a bad financial situation. You couple that with the deaths in her family and I think you have a pretty intense situation. Plus, she turned 35 the day before, so she jumped a demographic. I think that our all around situation vs. where she had always hoped she'd be at 35 is causing a lot of problems too.
Right now, I'm playing it cool as I can. If she goes through with the divorce, I will ask for a true separation first. We did it once before, but it wasn't really a separation. It was basically me going to work, coming over and spending time with the kids until they went to bed, and then sleeping over at my parents. I think in order to truly see if living apart is truly the right thing then we need to do so in earnest. Before the only real difference was where I actually lay my head down to sleep and where I left for from in the morning. Other than that, the situation was exactly the same.
