Actually if you go ahead and have that cry your heart will begin to finish healing T2.
It's the holding back and piling on the band-aids that messes you up.
Do not let all this conversation make you feel like you are back at the beginning because you are not.
I have been with you much of the way and you have moved through the process at a healthy and natural pace.
You just got a bit snagged at the end because you got excited about actually living again! There's no shame in that even though you now realize you jumped out of the frying pan and back into the fire too soon. All that matters is that NOW you are aware and since you haven't gotten into a committed relationship there's time to step back a bit.
So finish the journey. But NATURALLY. Don't sweat the process. Doing that just makes you slip into neutral.
And do not be pushed into anything. Grieving is a natural process like all the others you have been through. Correct, you are not ready for a relationship but that doesn't mean you can't have friends. In fact, you need them. Just stay more aware of the state of your own heart.
