WHY are you still talking to her at all? It isn't bringing any resolution or peace. Each time is an instance for her to attack you; you either have to go on the defensive or roll over. Break the cycle - don't answer the phone. Let it go to voicemail. She will be more hesitant to spew if she knows she is being recorded. Ask her to email you - again, it is documented.
You don't have to engage with an abusive person. Some might say to hang up when she gets talking, but that can be seen as passive-aggressive. Better not to even give her the chance to start.
I have been "co-parenting" with my X for more than 7 months through email; it has been rare that we have spoken on the phone, and even then, not more than a few sentences about the kids. And I can sleep at night. He still spews occassionally in the emails; I archive it and never look at it again. If he wants to live his life in an angry hell, that is his choice. I don't have to.
So sorry that you have to deal with this - talk with your lawyer again...
