Which direction do I go?

[AmyC]

Ping, you have actually answered the biggest question of all:

There is nothing more in life that I would want more than to save my family

there is nothing more I want in life than to have my family back.

If the above words are true, then you owe it to your family to clear the path.

Your wife is not going to be able to give you a positive indication right now of what she wants because she's being consumed by the reality of the situation, the chances she feels she missed to turn it around before it got to this point and the weight of the regret that comes with all of that. Trust me, it is enormous.

What Mike said is true:

Her words are cheap..her actions will move mountains and bring down walls..

With one exception:

It won't be your wife's actions that are going to bring down the walls or move mountains. The only thing needed for that is a willing spirit, on both your parts, to trust and let God's will be done.

If I were you, I would be still.
And I would be working on forgiveness.
Because that is the biggest thing that is going to required of both you and your wife. You need to forgive her, truly. And she is going to have to forgive herself. That road is the hardest one ahead of you both and it has to be traveled whether a reconciliation takes place or not.