So I was having a good day. I called my W just before lunch to see if she wanted to hang out (I know I should not have done that). Got her v/m, so I just went by myself. I was walking and was invited by a group to join a bible talk, which I ended up going to and really enjoyed. God is ever present--the discussion was about finding true happiness in Christ alone!! Something I really need. Anyhow I get back to work and I look up my W's online profile (I don't have access to her account, I can just see her profile), and I see that her mood is set to flattered and she has posted a hand drawn picture of herself. Obviously a gift from a man. See this kicks me in the stomach. Last night she was talking about wanting to just finish school and move away where no one knew us. She was talking about how she's sad about our life, how she's how perfect our family is and how everything goes together perfectly--everything but us. She said she wished she could just run from everything and start over. I kept the conversation away from our R, and I told her that she can't run away from herself or from God, and that no matter where she went he would follow. I urged her to look at herself before God and see what he wants her to see about herself. I told her I have been eagerly looking for what God is trying to show me. Anyhow, it was a decent conversation, nothing monumental, but it was the first time she brought things up. I'm almost sure she was on a date at lunch becuase she insists that she was at her desk when I called but somehow she didn't get my call. I think she avoided my call b/c she knew I was calling to make lunch plans and she already had plans she wouldn't cancel. Who knows. I may be running way off with this, but I just hate thinking that some other guy is drawing pics of her and she's feeling flattered by some other guy.
