This sounds like a bit of a crossroads - I'm not surprised it is a bit emotional for you, I would be surprised if you weren't feeling a bit daunted by it. I certainly would be.
So exciting about the Boston school news - creating an opportunity is good. I'm always about doing that I'm so pleased you played well in your master class and that it boosted your confidence. If you get a chance do email me some recordings of you playing. I would love to hear you.
T, I have so much confidence that you will work through your questions and grow. It seems it is what you are really good at from all your posts. You took the same opportunity to grow this time last year if I remember from your posts and look how amazingly you have done. It is so good that you realise that you have been in your own head too long and are taking positive action away from that. Sometimes we just need that time with ourselves but it is essential to realise when that time is over imo. Gym and yoga sound good. I am still loving my yoga - I try and go on a Friday night to lose my work stress.
You know, just because things went differently to planned last time you met B doesn't mean you have to go back to NC. Once you start getting used to emailing him it will get so much easier with practise. You could just send a chatty email about your plans and see what he comes up with, maybe don't ask directly as this may be pressure. You can chat about some stuff on re his website, remember that he always likes to hear from you and even asks your advice. He may be feeling as reticent as you.
I'm so pleased you played well in your master class and that it boosted your confidence. If you get a chance do email me some recordings of you playing. I would love to hear you.