I feel a bit lonely today. I guess I cant do much about it the way things are. But it really sucks to go thru another whole round of different limbo.
I have been calling H everyday. I never did that. I have been and we are having small talk about his work and the kids. Empty phonecalls with no meaning. He has stopped calling me. If I call at 16:00 we talk then, if I call at 12:00 we talk then, if I call at 18:00 we talk then. I am ok with that. I dont have any expectations I guess. But we sure seem to not moving along the way we should. Something feels... missing.
Tomorrow is the Cs. I am curious to see what they will say about our lack of actions. I am "trying" to make the calls. I dont know if it counts. And I was planning to ask him to sleep over on Friday. But I will decide that after the apt tomorrow.
