Please I need some advice. I'm a bit confused and I know you guys are the best to turn too since you all know the most about saving a marriage. So for those who don't know my sitch, H and I are separated, H is with OW and son. So the other day I realized something. I think that H thinks of me as old faithful and thinks that I will be waiting 'til he decides to come home. I feel that he thinks that its all about him. So I decided that I needed to pull the rug from under him. I told him that I am seeing some, the "OM", which was a lie. I just don't want H thinking that I will faithful just wait on him and like DR said I wanted to give the impression that I am moving on with my life. But DR never said that I should tell the WS that there is someone else. Now I am second guessing myself and not sure if I made a mistake for these reasons: I feel like maybe I've given up all my moral standing. H probably now feels like I am just like him and that its ok not to respect the marriage and to date other people. I feel like I may be givig H the go ahead. Then I feel like I've come down to H's level and am I playing by his rules. H has so many people around him just cheating and not being committed even OW, and now have I just become one of them. Am I giving the impression that I am no longer an different? I told H that I haven't slept with "OM" but he thinks that i'm just lying, like him I guess. Was this a mistake? Should I have taken the higher standing? Should I tell H that there is no "OM" or that I realized that seeing other people is not right since we are still married or should I continue to play along with "OM" existence? Please please give me some advice. I don't know what to do but will await until I get some advice.
Puppy Dog Tail, if you are reading this, I could really use some of your wise words.
