I know it appears terrible that they are in a church of all places but imagine for a second that this is meant to be, that one day, a sermon will be spoken with regard to adultery or something along those lines. Everything happens for a reason.
I remember when I was in my early teens. We were very good friends with this family. Then all of a sudden, I remember they were separated and my parents (with us in the car) drove by the wife's condo a few times to find the car of another man in who attended the same church as us and the family we were friends with.
Turns out the wife was having an affair with this married man who was well regarded in the church. Both couples eventually divorced. THe ones cheating married each other and the church granted their divorces so they could get married to each other.
This newly married couple have suffered some serious stuff. The man died of cancer and prior to his death lost his eyesight as a result. The wife has some incurable disease and she is not expected to live more than a few years at the most.
Sad and it makes you wonder if people did not sin like this, if they still would have come down with these horrible diseases.
Okay, I have rambled too much and too long. Sorry!!!
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
So nice to hear from you. How are you doing? I will call you soon or email.
Mid,
That is a sad story, but I often wonder the same about what happens to the Ml'er as time goes on. About 3 years ago, before ex and I separated we were at church and the sermon was on adultery. I had a feeling that ex was having an emotional affair at that time. I thought, this is wonderful. There is no way ex will continue with his affair after hearing this sermon. He totally blocked it out. Now things could change, I know, but my ex is a hard nut to crack.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
I know how you feel!!! Remember, they are in MLC, they have been abducted by an alien, plus especially in my case the OW has brain washed them. What I have been trying to do is when I think of what he has done & said to me I try to stop & say "H, I forgive you & bless you", sometimes I might say it a thousand times a day & then other days it's not so much. Also, when I think about OW I'm trying to tell her in my mind that I know she has problems & I cannot help her, in my mind I try to put her in another "room" & close the door. (That has not been working quite so well, but I'm trying it). This is just what I'm trying, it may not work for everyone, heck I don't know if it's working for me but I'm trying.
So nice to hear from you. You sound like you have a good plan.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
Ex did not pay my son's car insurance this month, so he has 10 days before it is cancelled.
Son will talk to ex about it.
Ex's priorities are so messed up.
Of course ex managed to pay for his car insurance.
Thinking of all of you.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
wondering t - will it ever end? will we get to be at that point where we are so grounded and strong and financially stable (that part is for me) that we won't even notice anymore?
just wondering.......
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
I think I will eventually get there...... maybe 2020
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
I find a lot of time for me. I work out on a regular basis, I crochet alot, watch a couple of favorite tv shows, go to movies, out to eat, I tan, read, pray, and occassionally get massages. I make sure I make "me time". I work with about 80 nurses and physicians. There is always something going on, birthday party, shower, wedding, birth of baby, social event. I try to attend these things more. The staff I work with is very supportive. In fact a nurse I work with is also going through her husband's MLC. She is at the beginning stages though. He has OW and is cakeeating quite a bit right now. She is just experiencing the lying and manipulating behaviors. He says he will end it, but never does. I am trying to help her go through this.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
