I agree with Sara about wanting his happy ending and the kids being in the way.

As for the spotless house rubbish. When we die who wants to be remembered for a spotless house? This is an excuse he has gotten his teeth into and in a busy house it's nigh on impossible and he knows that.

The arrangement as it is obviously suits your H Yoyo. I really think it would take moving forward with a D to get him to change.....but if you take that step you have to be prepared to carry it through if you have to. I think your H thinks if he moves back home it will revert to how the M was prior to his A.

The longer it goes on the longer it will be to get him to alter. As far as your H is concerned, he doesn't need to do a 180 because as it stands it works. It's YOU it doesn't work for Yoyo, so you have to be the one to motivate hime to change.

Saffie
me 46
H 46
M in 1986
D20,D18,S16,D13
H's A 01/05 to 07/06
H recommitted to M 07/06
renewed vows 09/06
Going from strength to strength